I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
