People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize