No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize