I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
