so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
