im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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