oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize