we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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