real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Randomize
