well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
MIDGETS
????
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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