He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
