I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
