literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
