that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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