i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize