wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
They took my balls.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
