Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
