I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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