you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
