batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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