Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
