Where did you get a picture of my penis
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
