No stitches, just platelets and will power
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
