ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
