this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
That was before I lit my hair on fire
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
