is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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