If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
