i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
should my penis look like a turkey
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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