Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
