My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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