Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
