My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
