If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
