Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
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