before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
