i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
