He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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