I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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