I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Randomize
