I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
