He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
