sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
not ubering you a puppy
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
