Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Mom said you looked used
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
My bed smells like the plague
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