He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
