You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
