there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
