Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Randomize
