Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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