I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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