yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
