But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize